I started this morning by doing something a bit different. I woke up at 3:30am.
It wasn’t part of becoming a morning person so I can find that magical morning productivity. Screw that.
I woke up because I had 5:55am flight scheduled to Minneapolis, where I’ll be giving a workshop on Visual Regression Testing.
I mention all this, because I had a moment as I was waking up where I thought to myself, “I really don’t want to travel 1000 miles today”. It was one of those ‘what am I doing?!’ type feelings that digs deep.
Thoughts shot through my mind. “I’m not a traveler”, “I’m not that fond of flying”, and ultimately “Who am I joking being up this early like some sort of ’professional’? I’m just a kid.”
It’s a weird feeling, waking up early one morning, jumping on a plane, flying to stay at some hotel, only to fly back late the next night. I’m pretty sure only highly-paid business executives do this sort of thing.
Overall, I felt like a fraud trying to hang with the cool kids. A wannabe in the business world.
But here I am now, sitting on a plane (that’s going through a little bit of turbulence did I mention I’m not that fond of flying?) and writing this up.
I no longer feel like a fraud. I just feel like I’m following my passion. I love teaching, I love mentoring. Giving workshops is one way to do that. If I have to wake up after only 4 hours of sleep to travel across the county to do that, sign me up.
Following your passion can feel a lot like being a fraud. You’re putting yourself out there and taking risks. You’re doing things you wouldn’t normally do, to get to a place where you can do the thing you’re passionate about.
It helped this morning when I realized that. Of course waking up at 3:30 felt unnatural. That’s not my thing. But teaching is, and if I need to wake up at 3:30 to do that every once in a while, then I’ll be that fraud.
I won’t wear a business suit. I’ll carry a backpack instead of a briefcase. And I will chase my dreams, following them down whatever path it takes me to get there.
Gotta go, pilot says there some heavy turbulence up ahead.